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Skimm for August 19th

Skimm’d at a baseball game

QUOTE OF THE DAY “Big hug” — Russian President Vladimir Putin signing off on a radio chat with Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev. Cuties. Skimm This

THINGS WITH TROUBLE IN AISLE FOUR

WALMART THE STORY Yesterday, Walmart said it’s officially on the profit struggle bus. WAIT, WHY? The retailer’s sales haven’t been looking so hot lately. To reverse that, the company started spending more. Think: longer hours, increased wages for workers, and a bigger focus on e-commerce. The good news? Sales went up. The bad news? Walmart has been spending so much that its overall profits are down...by double digits. Yesterday, it also announced that it’s lowering earnings targets moving forward. Womp womp. theSKIMM Walmart used to be the world’s most valuable retailer. Until recently, when a little company called Amazon took its place. Yesterday’s announcement is more bad news for traditional stores who were slow to jump on the e-commerce bandwagon. Skimm This

TARGET THE STORY Yesterday, Target agreed to say ‘sorry’ for a 2013 data breach. In this case, ‘sorry’ means a $67 million check. WAIT, WHY? Back in the holiday season of 2013, Target got hit by an epic cyberattack. 40 million credit and debit cards were exposed to fraud. Not a Merry Chrismukkah. Yesterday, Target announced a settlement with Visa. The $67 million will go towards the banks that sent customers new Visas after theirs were hacked. Target’s still settling up with MasterCard. theSKIMM Credit card companies, the government, and pretty much every business in the world is trying to figure out how to make their networks more secure. This settlement is another reminder that hacks are a security threat — and they’re also pretty f’ing expensive messes to clean up. Skimm This

REPEAT AFTER ME...

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU’RE BF ASKS IF YOU’RE READY… Oh, I’m ready. Yesterday, the FDA approved a drug that wants to turbocharge women’s sex drive. It’s called ‘Addyi’ because “I just watched ‘The Notebook’ again” didn’t fit on the box. This is the first approved drug of its kind and the pharmaceutical industry has pushed for it to get the green light for a while. And surprise, so have women. But the FDA rejected it twice because of concerns over side effects. The libido-fixing drug apparently doesn’t pair well with alcohol, among other lovely side effects. Women who take the drug reportedly have one extra “sexually satisfying event” per month. That’s an event that will get RSVPs. Skimm This

WHAT TO SAY WHEN THE AIRPORT SECURITY LINE IS BACKED UP AND YOU MISS YOUR FLIGHT... The TSA is going to hear about this in my Yelp review. Thanks to a new agreement with the review site, US agencies can now claim or create Yelp pages. And respond directly to your constructive criticism about the long line at the post office.  This should go well.   Skimm This

WHAT TO SAY AFTER YOU HEAR THE WHITE HOUSE HIRED ITS FIRST OPENLY TRANSGENDER STAFFER... ‘Bout time. This week, two women are becoming the first female graduates of the Army’s Ranger School . Meaning they completed an intense training course that makes your triathlete friend look out of shape. Rangers are an elite special ops force in the US military. So elite that 400 people tried out, and only 96 made the cut - including these two women. Problem is, they can’t actually join the Rangers yet because women still aren’t officially allowed to serve in combat roles. The Pentagon’s making a decision later this year on how that rule should change for different military positions. But the Navy SEALs are feeling inclusive. Yesterday, a top Navy admiral said there’s “no reason” that women who can take the heat should be left off the SEAL team.  Skimm This

THING TO KNOW Mineral water: Making regular water feel inferior since forever. It’s water that comes from a mineral spring, complete with — yup – minerals like calcium. Often sparkling (think: Perrier).

SKIMM LIFE We’re all about that ‘bass(ador). Yup, the Skimm’bassadors have their own playlist now. Listen up.

SKIMM SHARE Skimm’ing is good, but Skimm’ing from the beach is better. Top 10 sharers get to sit in the sand with this swag. Here’s how to share theSkimm.

SKIMM BIRTHDAYS * indicates Skimm’bassador. Make a wish.   *Amy Yazdian (New York, NY); *Whitney Hinckley (Cincinnati, OH); *Girina Pandit (Tucson, AZ); *Terri Peters (Pasadena, MD); Molly Jong-Fast (New York, NY); *Ashley Cangelosi Llewellyn (New Orleans, LA); *Madison McGill (Grapevine, TX); *Molly Cullen (Minneapolis, MN); *Shannon Campagna (Alexandria, VA); *Steffie Tomson (Houston, TX); *Sophia Serrao  (Gainesville, FL); *Cassandra Lautredou (Little Rock, AR); *Kandace Parker (Little Rock, AR); *Emily Button (Indianapolis, IN); *Colleen McGee (Annapolis, MD); *Girina Pandit (Tucson, AZ); Pedro Mendonça (São Paulo, Brazil); Rachel Cargo (Boston, MA); Bart Witmer (San Francisco, CA); Melissa Manuel (New York, NY); Robert Kroez (Delmar, NY); Jessie Alvaro (Fair Lawn, NJ); Laura Gibson (Elmhurst, IL); Bozenna Hartzell (New York, NY);  Julie Noblick (Washington, DC); Carson Heimann (New York, NY); Katie Taaffe (Dallas, TX); Victoria Pappas (New York, NY); Elly McKenna (Fairfield, CT); Laura Granite (New York, NY); Emma Tuz (New York, NY); *Taylor Gillilan (Birmingham, AL); Robin Moodley (Cleveland, OH); Cynthia Johnson (Culver City, CA); Meira Levison (Tel Aviv, Israel); Sandra Widlitz (Yardley, PA); Brandy Satterwhite (Raleigh, NC); Cindy Meyer (Leawood, KS);  Barbara Steppe (North Bellmore, NY); Danielle Moran (Berkeley Heights, NJ); Tara Delany (Orlando, FL); Courtney Futryk (Washington, DC ); Molly Breiner (New York, NY); *Lilibeth Rivera (Bronx, NY); Jamie Rosenberg (Edgartown, MA); Matt Golden (Weston, MA); Peggy Hoyt (Winnetka, IL); Janeen Gonzalez (Los Angeles, CA); Heidi Adams (Raleigh, NC); Andrea LoBalbo (Arlington, VA); Elizabeth Scouler (Los Angeles, CA); Hannah Gettleman  (Chicago, IL); Jennie Dopf (New York, NY); Haley Vallon Chestnut (Athens, GA)

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