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Skimm for September 15th

Skimm’d over football

QUOTE OF THE DAY “Adequate BMI” — Apparently a requirement to be a crew member at Air India. The airline is reportedly firing 125 employees for being out of shape. The company also said eating some spicy airline food should help. Skimm This

THINGS WITH A PLOT TWIST

AUSTRALIA THE STORY Yesterday morning, Australia’s government told the country, ‘G’day mates! While you were sleeping we got a new prime minister.‘  WAIT...BACK UP. For the last two years, Australia’s been run by a man named Tony Abbott. You may remember him as the guy who got Putin to cuddle a koala. Abbott’s never exactly been Mr. Popular, but lately his approval ratings have been worse than usual. Australia’s economy  has slowed, with many worried a recession is around the corner. That, plus Abbott’s stances on same-sex marriage (against it) and climate change (not sure it exists) hasn’t sat well with many Aussies.  SO WHAT HAPPENED? The other members of Abbott’s party took a look at the calendar, and realized the PM’s unpopularity meant they’d probably lose their seats in next year’s elections. So on Monday, Malcolm Turnbull – one of Abbott’s main political rivals within his own party – said he wanted the top job instead . More than half of lawmakers agreed. Now, Turnbull’s the new PM, and Abbott’s packing his Vegemite. theSKIMM The country’s economy has been looking down under, so political chaos isn’t necessarily the recipe for success. TBD on whether the new guy can Turnbull it around. Skimm This

RUSSIA THE STORY  Yesterday, US officials spread some good cheer and let everyone know that Russia’s been beefing up its military presence in Syria.   WAIT…BACK UP.  Syria’s been going through a civil war for more than four years, with rebels fighting to oust Syrian President Assad. Over the years, Assad’s gotten help from his squad (think Russia & friends).  Meanwhile, the US & friends have bonded over helping the rebels trying to get rid of Assad. In the last year, though, ISIS came to town, and f inally, everyone agreed on something: get rid of ISIS.   WHAT NOW? Russia’s now sending in some serious equipment. Think: more troops and tanks.  Some would call this military escalation; Russia said it’s called fighting terrorism. theSKIMM  Russia’s military buildup conveniently gives them a serious military presence in the Mideast. It also conveniently makes it more awkward for the US not to take a bigger role in the Syrian crisis. Guess who’s super excited by all this? Rhymes with Shamerica.  Skimm This

REPEAT AFTER ME...

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR MOM ASKS HOW YOUR NEW ROOMMATE IS… Not getting better. Over the weekend, wildfires in northern California caused thousands of people to evacuate. Yesterday, the situation got worse. Two separate fires completely destroyed hundreds of homes and displaced over 20,000 people, and one of the blazes is still barely contained. These fires are in large part thanks to a massive drought California’s been going through. Meanwhile, yesterday, southern Utah was hit by flash flooding caused by a thunderstorm. At least eight people were killed, and five others are missing.

WHAT PEOPLE ARE WATCHING... A scary day at Mississippi’s Delta State University. Last night, a male university professor who was suspected in two murders shot and killed himself. This was after he was suspected of killing another male professor on campus earlier in the day. Police are investigating whether there’s a connection to another shooting, in which a woman romantically connected to the suspect was shot and killed. If you think this feels like it might’ve been some kind of love triangle, you’re not alone. But police say they aren’t ready to talk motive yet.

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR FRIEND IN FINANCE IS LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB… Maybe steer clear of Deutsche Bank. Yesterday, Reuters reported that the German bank will not be needing a bigger boat, as it plans to fire about a quarter of the company’s employees. The news comes after a rough couple of months for the bank. First, it paid out billions in legal fees for things like allegedly manipulating interest rates. Then it was investigated for tax fraud. Then its co CEOs, Phil & Lil,  resigned . Enter the new boss, who’s promised to cut costs. Which in this case looks like it means jobs. Deutsche Bank isn’t the only one on the struggle bus. Other European banks – like Italy’s UniCredit and Britain’s Barclays — have recently announced layoffs to cut costs. Skimm This

WHAT TO SAY TO YOUR FRIEND WHO CELEBRATED ROSH HASHANAH… Happy New Year. Good news: Ahnold kept his promise — he came back. Skimm This

THING TO KNOW Noma: The ‘best restaurant in the world.’ It’s in Copenhagen and no, you can’t get a rez. It’s closing at the end of next year to make room for an urban farm. Because why not? Skimm This

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