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Skimm for January 7th

Skimm’d from Vegas

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“I regret it every day” — Joe Biden on his decision not to run for president. Looks like Kanye’s got some competition. #2020

KIM JONG-UH OH

THE STORY

Earlier this week, North Korea said it dropped the H-bomb. Yesterday, the US said ‘profanity’s not necessary, and pretty sure you’re lying.’

BACK UP.

In between questionable haircuts and snooping on Hollywood , North Korea has been talking about upping its nuclear game and threatening war for years. Not good, since NK’s a dictatorship that does not play well with others. Despite heavy UN sanctions, the country’s been trying to bulk up its small-scale nuclear program for a while, and has conducted three nuclear tests in recent years. And then earlier this week, North Korea said it tested a hydrogen bomb. Which is kinda like Khaleesi, the mother of nuclear tests.

WHAT’S THE REACTION BEEN?

The US and South Korea called Kim Jong-un’s bluff, with the US saying early analysis is “not consistent” with a hydrogen bomb test. Still, the incident made the international community go ‘whoa whoa whoa, North Korea did what???’ And countries around the world (especially NK’s neighbors) said they’re ready to take action if the H-bomb test was the real deal.

theSKIMM

If NK’s claims are true, it would mean the country is a much bigger nuclear threat than everyone previously thought. There’s a short list of countries (including the US, Russia, and China) who have tested a hydrogen bomb, and no one wants North Korea to join that club.

REPEAT AFTER ME...

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU HEAR CHINA’S STOCK MARKET IS STILL STRUGGLING…

Chipotle can relate. Yesterday, the chain announced that it’s facing a federal criminal investigation. This comes after hundreds of people have gotten sick in recent months after eating its food (some with E. coli, some with norovirus, all with lots of extra time in the bathroom). The criminal investigation is in connection with one norovirus outbreak that made more than 200 people sick at a location in Cali. This burrito bowl of problems caused sales to drop more than 30% last month. Chipotle’s CEO has promised to make the chain the “safest place to eat.” But for now, sales are still Mexi-coma status.

WHAT PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT...

Yesterday, the Texas state trooper who arrested Sandra Bland was charged with perjury. Reminder: Bland is the 28-year-old black woman who was stopped by a state trooper over the summer for failing to signal a lane change. Their interaction got heated, and Bland was arrested. She was then found dead in her jail cell three days later. Officials said her death was a suicide. But there have been questions over how her arrest actually went down, especially because some of the interaction happened off-camera. The state trooper said he was just trying to safely conduct a traffic investigation. But yesterday, a grand jury “found that statement to be false.” The state trooper was fired and faces up to a year in jail.

WHAT TO SAY TO YOUR FRIEND WHO’S HAVING A BACHELOR PARTY IN VEGAS…

Party like a tech star. CES - aka Consumer Electronics Show, or product show-and-tell for tech companies - is going down in Sin City. And the new toys are shining, shimmering, splendid. Intel released an X-ray helmet that lets you see through things like faulty pipes. Sexy. A secretive car company called Faraday Future unveiled a concept for an electric car that could make Tesla sweat. And a lot of people said the word ‘disruptive.’ In other news that makes Christmas come again for your techie friends, Oculus Rift went on preorder yesterday. It’s that virtual reality headset that people have been freaking out about for a while. It sold out in less than 15 minutes, even though it costs $599. Force is strong with that one.

WHAT TO SAY TO YOUR FRIEND WHO STILL HASN’T SEEN “MAKING A MURDERER...”

Beware the spoilers. Yesterday, Gov. Scott Walker (R-WI) said ‘nah’ to pardoning Steven Avery and his nephew Brendan Dassey, the subjects of the Netflix documentary series everyone’s been watching. Avery was wrongfully convicted for sexual assault and served 18 years in prison...then he and Dassey were convicted of murder in a different case and sent to prison. There are questions over whether they were wrongly convicted. Thanks to Netflix, the questions have gotten so loud that hundreds of thousands of people have signed a petition to have Avery pardoned. President Obama was also petitioned to pardon Avery, but Walker’s actually the only one with the power to do it. Outlook: very hazy.

THING TO KNOW

Ken Griffey Jr. and Mike Piazza: New kids on the Baseball Hall of Fame block. You already know their names for their epic careers in the 90s and 2000s, but now you know they’re officially a big deal. Plus, Griffey got the highest percentage of votes ever while getting elected. Play ball.

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